A Crazy Monday --- But wait it is Tuesday -- duh!

Tonight is the ladies' dinner and devotion. We are reading the book: What Happens When Women Say Yes to God. I haven't completed it yet. I knew that it was a bad time of the year for me to get in with this book discussion but I really wanted to read the book. It was just hard to read that and keep up with my daily bible reading and do all the extra things to get my room ready. The dinner tonight is for people who have and have not read the book, so I won't feel so bad about going. Jessica is going with me. I know we will have fun and enjoy the fellowship.

I can't talk about work right now because I have so many negative feelings that I probably need to keep them to myself until I have worked them all out. I will say that I am working everyday when I get home for several more hours. It makes for a long day.

I have to work the ballgame Thursday night. I don't really mind because I need to get pictures for the yearbook.

We are going to Paul's mom's house this weekend. Monday is his dad's birthday so this weekend will be hard on her. It is time to get my casserole out of the oven and go. And for the one person who will care what kind of casserole; it is a Mexican rice with beef and cheese.

I was at Wal-Mart getting groceries and thanks to the extremely long line; I got to see the 14 million dollar baby pictures in People. (I think Jimmy and Jessica's baby pictures are worth more than that!)

I forget every time I go to Wal-Mart how much I HATE going on Saturday mornings. I just go to get it finished so we don't have to go on Sunday.I see way too many people and my ex in laws are always there doing their shopping. I get to experience the stares and avoidance from people who were family for 16 years. It still makes me sad. I do miss my nieces and nephews. I took Daniel to his first day of school. I would take a nap with Samantha sleeping on my chest. I would always braid Chelsea's and Kristen's hair and they loved going to church with me and the kids.

I started back to work Wednesday. After 10 years, it has finally become just a job. I lost the passion for it. The administration played a large part in that.

Jeff is here this weekend. We have a poker game planned at my parents' house. (They went to W. Virginia to see Dad's family. ) I am excited about it!!!

Jessica and I have not gotten along for about a year, since she has had a boyfriend. After an another argument, Paul privately told me that I was not letting her grow up and was treating her like she was 10 instead of almost 18. I didn't want to make the same mistakes that my mom did. After I got over the hurt feelings, I agreed with him. I started thinking about how to make our life better and make a more suitable home for adult children.

I made a plan and decided it would be best for a family meeting. I would tell them what I would give them and what I expected in return, and then let them have their input also. I had the speech worked out in my head and knew the ending would be us all laughing, holding hands and skipping in a meadow full of wildflowers with a gentle breeze blowing our hair. What was I thinking???????

I was half right, Jimmy was fine with what I said to him. He just needed to work on cleaning up after himself instead of expecting us to do it.

Jessica wasn't excited about the things I said, which were tons better then what she already had. She said many hurtful things to both me and Paul. She spoke what has been built up for months, if not years. I was sadden by what she said but glad she finally spoke what she felt. It ended with Jess and me hugging and wiping the tears, then we went our separate ways for alone time.

I hope that was the last of the explosions between us. I love her and want a good life for her. It is hard to let her decide what that "good life" will be.

I got my hair cut yesterday. I asked to take my hair home and put in the garden because it keeps the rabbits away. Then I felt stupid for asking and the girl couldn't find a bag to put it in so it got thrown away. There was a bunch of it because I haven't cut my hair since Jan. and it was down to the middle of my back and now it is to my shoulders.



I worked more in my classroom yesterday.



Today I will go to Jeff's new house and meet the air conditioner men. Hopefully they won't take long to fix it because it is going to be hot today!



I saw a guy yesterday in just his boxers and nothing else. He had went to the curb in front of his house and was squatted down talking to someone in a car. It was gross!!!!